:: With the addition of Oakland A’s player Ben Zobrist to the Royals’ roster, I sure hope Royals’ utility infielder Cheslor Cuthbert doesn’t get demoted to Omaha. Not because he’s a great player or anything but because he’s got one of the greatest names I’ve ever heard. It rolls off the tongue and has a felicitous ring.
W.C. Fields
It’s as good as some of the great names that comic actor W.C. Fields invented for some of his memorable film characters. Like Augustus Winterbottom in Tillie and Gus (1933); or T. Frothingill Bellows in The Big Broadcast of 1938 (1938); or Egbert Sousé (“accent grave,” Fields would always say when introducing himself) in The Bank Dick (1940). And my favorite, Larson E. Whipsnade in You Can’t Cheat an Honest Man (1939).
:: And while we’re on the Royals, I fear that the addition of “ace” pitcher Johnny Cueto is going to insure that we can’t beat the Cardinals in the World Series.
Here’s the deal…In 2010, Cueto intentionally kicked Cardinals’ catcher Jason LaRue in the head, giving him a concussion. It was about the 20th concussion LaRue had suffered, and he quit baseball. Understandably, the Cardinals have hated Cueto ever since…And, as we all know, the Cardinals never forget.
Umpire Don Denkinger making the call that altered the course of the 1985 World Series.
We remember, too: Game 6, 1985, Don Denkinger’s erroneous call at first base, which led to the Royals coming back and winning that pivotal game and going on to win Game 7 the next day. Hell, not only does that incident still burn in the minds of St. Louis residents who were alive at the time, it simmers in the minds of their children and grandchildren. If a Royals-Cardinals World Series comes about, look for venom thick as lava to ooze from the pores of every Cardinals’ fan’s body.
:: I sensed from my last post about Kansas City International Airport that a handful of you remain resistant to the emerging plan to build a single new terminal at KCI, replacing the ugly and impractical three-terminal set-up that has been in place since KCI opened in the early 1970s. Well, the government of New York State is dealing with a similar problem at Laguardia Airport, which is in line for a $4 billion rebuilding.
On Monday, NPR Morning Edition host Steve Inskeep led into the story like this: “One of the nation’s busiest and most maligned airports is getting a $4 billion overhaul. New York authorities are applying the theory of creative destruction. If you want to build something great, destroy something first, like LaGuardia.”
Then, reporter Joel Rose picked up, saying, “(Gov. Andrew) Cuomo unveiled a design for single, unified terminal, in contrast to the hodgepodge of separate terminals that make up LaGuardia today.”
Hmmm. Seems to me that “creative destruction” is precisely the plan for KCI. Moreover, Rose might as well have been talking about KCI when he mentioned the “hodgepodge of separate terminals.”
So, let’s shout it all together now: “Onward and upward at KCI! Onward and upward!”
JimmyCsays: At the juncture of journalism and daily life in KC 
A spate of recent air travel has taxied me off the runway, from denier to applier. Yes, we need a new airport — desperately. Today’s MCI flughafen is a hot mess. It was a great and innovative concept and working facility in its day, but sadly, that day has flown away. It’s time for new construction to takeoff.
Love that word “flughagen.” It’s a new one for me…
(Gayle — In reference to your comment below, how dare you challenge the “exalted moderator,” as Jason has referred to me…Flughafen, Schmughafen.)
flughafen
Touche. Student learns from master. Besides, you’re the one who said you like it — should get it right.
Jimbo: Good column. Typo in fifth graph, though. Should be “directly” sted “indirectly.” Or just leave out.
A St. Louis reader — a former reporter and editor at the P-D, weighs in…I said they still remember. (I removed the adverb, Tim.)
T-bone to ground round, Fritz:
LaGuardia is consistently in the top 20/US in terms of passengers served.
MCI is a distant 33rd/US, usually boarding an (est.) 5 mil. passengers p/a less.
LaGuardia’s new single terminal design will incorporate connections to mass transportation, including rail and water taxis (being surrounded on three sides by water.)
MCI doesn’t know jackshit about mass transportation; Kansas City has instead elected to opt for street cars (that don’t run the 30 miles to MCI0 and the closely held Yellow Cab monopoly.
LaGuardia’s redesign has the power of Joe Biden behind it.
MCI has Sly, a bunch of shiftless ex-city council people and the local architecture/construction firms endorsing the change.
LaGuardia has been referred to as a ‘third world cesspool’.
MCI is constantly referred to as “one of the most convenient airports in America.”
Half the airborne world, and all of NY, want to bring LaGuardia into the 21st century.
NO ONE other than politicians/lobbying groups wants to change the current MCI configuration.
Both the $4 billion (LaGuardia) and $1 billion (MCI) estimates are no where near close to the final costs.
in both cases local taxpayers will be on the hook for the overruns, this despite the promises of all the politicians.
LaGuardia needs an overhaul.
MCI does not.
Nothing you’ve so far posted leads me to believe you have solid reasoning for your support. Instead, it appears that on this one you are going with “your gut.”
Perhaps more reflection is in order.
No need to shout, using bold face, Will. (Now reduced to normal volume by the moderator.)
You make some excellent points in your comparison. The problem is, when all is said and done, KCI still sucks and is getting worse by the day…And don’t underestimate Sly. As I’ve said before, he’s gone about this very methodically, and the pieces appear to be falling into place. On the other hand, Dan Coffey is enjoying his newfound status as “Mr. NO!” in Kansas City. (No streetcar expansion, no hotel, no new airport) We’ve had a few fringe people like that going back to Lydia Miller and Bill Redpath. They flap their wings a lot but generate nothing more than a light breeze.
Sorry, but I HATE (are you going to change that to lc?) that you change posters’ comments. I suppose it’s your right as “moderator,” but I find it very invasive. Words are put down in a certain way for a specific reason and you are taking it upon yourself to modify them.
Didn’t change a word. Oh, yeah, he had “buncha of shiftless….” and I changed it to “bunch of shiftless…”
That’s my point!! Besides, I didn’t say you changed words, per se.
Actually, when I saw the bold, I physically cringed – it WAS over the top…
And since Fitz never censors the comments, I’ve no issue with the edits.
RE ‘buncha of’ vs. ‘bunch of’, that was well caught, ‘buncha of’ being guilty of both redundancy and suspect grammar usage.
RE the topic itself, MCI needs nothing other than some refurbishing; tearing down the current structure for a 1 terminal design will not ipso facto turn it into DIA.
DIA is DIA because it’s in Denver with all that means.
A new MCI will still be Kansas City – still smoked pulled pork, but with fresh lipstick.
Actually, I’ve been disappointed that he’s allowed several typos in my posts to go by. I just figured that, like The Star, his budget for copy editors had been eliminated, but now my expectations have risen again.
If we had an edit button…oh, never mind, this comment never generates a reply.
:-)
Will may NotB but a new airport for Kansas City needs to be. Though I’m not a fan of the price tag for the proposed single terminal concept–nor do I believe $1 billion would be the number on the final sales receipt taxpayers would get–the design and physical condition of Kansas City International Airport is, perhaps, the best example of the city’s decaying infrastructure. Certainly it’s the most visible.
Mr. NotB’s mixed metaphor is more of a stretch than a pull, yet he takes a counterintuitive path to a point well made. You can polish a turd, but it’s still a turd. Renovating the current terminals, which were out of step with the industry when they were dedicated in 1972, would be money ill spent. Whether irony or coincidence, then Vice President Spiro Agnew oversaw the dedication of the disastrous design championed by TWA’s bet that jumbo jets and supersonic transports would populate the gates at Terminals A, B and C.
We all know that didn’t happen. The Concorde once made a publicity appearance at KCI, and the last time I saw passengers deplane from a 747 it was painted baby blue and was surrounded by guys in dark suits talking into their cufflinks.
To be sure, KCI is a locals airport. Yes, I too love, and have loved, the convenience of the drive-by drop off and pick up. Armed with Internet/smartphone check-in (especially if you have TSA-pre approval) and only a carry-on bag, you don’t even need to come to a full stop to get dropped off or picked up for a flight.
That’s the perfect KCI experience touted by opponents to a new terminal. It’s also an emotional and short-sighted response.
If you factor in the long-term parking trek, checked luggage, and getting a party of more than one through security, the convenience factor quickly evaporates. God forbid you need to navigate the peak Southwest Airlines cattle drives in Terminal B. Even worse, try and get from one terminal to another, after midnight in a driving rain because you left on one airline and returned on another and need to retrieve your car. Those intra-terminal transport buses are like the proverbial cop–never around when you need one.
This doesn’t even address the shopping/dining experience arguments made by proponents of a single terminal. Those are tertiary points to the debate. Frankly, nobody goes to an airport to eat and shop. If I have time and can get a cup of coffee, great. Otherwise, give me a clean bathroom and get me on my way.
Let’s be honest, Kansas City is the end of the stagecoach line. For the most part, Ma and Pa, or other kin are hauling us to/from the farm so we can get the connecting flight to the big city that takes us on to our final destination. Direct flights from KCI are getting as thin as The Kansas City Star.
Despite two professional sports teams and a world-class art museum, Kansas City is not a Class A city. It’s not really even a Class B city. There’s a reason real estate is such a bargain here, and why Kansas City is so livable. We are a Class C city. People are not flocking to live here. Corporations (I’m talking Fortune 500s) are not flocking to relocate here. Nobody in Paris, Los Angeles, London or New York is talking about Kansas City. Not unless they are from here.
We aren’t as hip as we like to or are led to believe. Trust me, they aren’t talking about us in Brooklyn, which, if you live in Manhattan, isn’t hip either.
The point being, we don’t need to spend $4 billion as is proposed for the much-needed revamp of LaGuardia (New York City’s convenience equivalent of KCI). We do need to fix what is broken, even if it’s just a Walmart big box and not a soaring Eero Saarinen-inspired design that TWA jammed down the New York Port Authority’s throat in the 1960s.
It, like KCI, was designed to accommodate jumbo jets, SSTs and the drive-by drop off. And it, like KCI, is obsolete despite its beauty, and is as empty as the now shuttered Terminal A.
Thanks for the thought-provoking comment, Joe…A few points:
1. The poetry of Line One shows why you’re a professional writer.
2. On polishing turds…Reminds me of a feature story I read 40 to 50 years ago about Pete Rose. The writer was doing a “ride-along” with Rose and one stop was at the barber shop. After rising from the chair and looking in the mirror, he says, “Nice job, Rosie, it’s hard to polish a turd.”
3. After I’ve been named chairman of the airport-election committee, you’ll hear me saying on radio, TV and in the papers the argument that KCI is convenient is “emotional and short-sighted.” You will also hear me saying that if we don’t get a new, single terminal, we risk becoming “a parochial backwater.” (I’m stealing that line, too, but from a story I read yesterday in The New York Times about Boston dropping its bid for the 2024 Summer Olympics.)
4. I’m ashamed of you, Joe, for slotting this great city in the “C” range. Just because you’ve lived in a variety of great cities and are about to (or already have) head off to Denver to do research for your next novel doesn’t make it OK to bash your hometown…Once again, I quote then-Mayor Emanuel Cleaver — who singlehandedly lifted KC from 12 years of an inferiority complex nurtured under Dick Berkley — “This is not some podunk town along I-70; this is Kansas City!”
Keenan.
While I agree with your analysis of Kansas City, razing MCI to erect a new facility in its stead will not promote us to even Class B status.
Especially when visitors enter the city proper and discover our true decaying infrastructure: roads, lights, urban blight and sewage/water (should they be unfortunate enough to have to travel surface roads during even a moderate rainfall.)
However, ultimately self-worth (the ultimate MacGuffin, it opens the door to the exact type of emotional arguments single-terminal proponents decry: “We need to build a new single terminal lest we be consigned as “a parochial backwater””) and opinions shouldn’t matter: yours, mine or anyone else’s.
What should be considered are at least a couple of independent, thoroughly transparent cost/benefit analyses combined with at least 3 detailed and public RFPs, for both the proposed solution and a refurb. (And, no, the city and Southwest’s don’t count, being somewhat less than impartial.)
I’ve seen nothing along those lines, certainly not here, which prompted my original assertion that Fritz is “going with his gut.” As, it appears, are you.
If said documents exist and are available I’d appreciate a link. Otherwise count me among the highly skeptical.
On the 1985 World Series game 6 never-ending Cardinals fans rage-gasm:
“The next batter, Jim Sundberg, attempted a sacrifice bunt, but Worrell threw to third base to force out Orta, the runner Denkinger called safe, and this was the only out recorded by the Cardinals in the inning.”
— from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don_Denkinger
NOTE: Though its sedative nature is admittedly remarkable, my principled nature forces me to derail this little-airport-that-could back-and-forth. You see, as a Royals fan I feel compelled to correct this conveniently counterfactual characterization of events and make an humanitarian effort to quell the emotional pain endured by, apparently, every single St. Louis Cardinals fan on the planet (as illustrated via their histrionics and city-wide tantrum). Oh and I wanted to get a few more hyphens in this comment.
I’m not concerned about the hyphens, Shelby…It’s the back-of-the-hand dismissal of the little-airport-that-could. Seems like a devil-may-care attitude toward a very big issue.
I think I just received a thinly veiled smack-down.
I just wanted to out-hyphen you, Shelby. All in the spirit of bandying about, you know.