With slightly more than 24 hours to go before knee-replacement surgery, I’m starting to get kinda cranky.
And you know what happens when that happens: Things can quickly get more visceral than rational. Like the time several months ago when I laid into the morons who came up with — and executed — that goofy and offensive yard-sign campaign to promote the “Big Slick ’16” Children’s Mercy fund-raiser.
I capped off that post by saying I hoped the fund-raiser was a failure, earning me well-deserved criticism from commenters who were more sanguine, and rational, about it.
But I’ve got my boots on and am ready to wade into a few things again today…
:: Like, why in the hell would a woman who is 21 years younger than Roger Ailes — the big boss who is on his way out at Fox News because of sexual harassment allegations — marry that fat fuck in the first place?
Roger Ailes and wife Elizabeth Tilson
Elizabeth Tilson — a fairly attractive woman — married the guy in 1998, when she was 37 and Ailes was 58. They’ve got a 16-year-old son named Zac. Maybe she genuinely fell in love with Ailes, but, really, doesn’t it make you scratch your head?
Why? To be close to money and power? A hell of a lot more likely than true love, I would venture.
In any event, she’s now got to descend the power ladder with her husband. I wonder if she’ll go all the way to the bottom or bail with a golden parachute?
:: Why would a major party’s presidential nominee invite a former opponent to speak at the party’s nominating convention when the nominee hasn’t secured the guest speaker’s commitment to endorse him?
That’s what happened at the Republican National Convention tonight, when Sen. Ted Cruz of Texas spoke and then got booed after it became clear he wasn’t going to endorse Trump and was just grandstanding for himself.
A New York Times commenter who goes by “peterhenry” hit it on the head when he wrote:
“Another mistake from the Trump campaign. It really does seem that it’s being run by his children. Lawyers are taught to never ask a witness a question that they don’t already know the answer to. Trump’s campaign put an ‘unfriendly’ competitor to Trump on TV in prime time, having no idea of what this person would say, and whether or not he’d endorse their candidate. Now they know. Third night of amateur hour in Cleveland.”
:: To show you I haven’t just got it in for the Republicans tonight, here comes the skewer for former top Obama adviser David Plouffe…I just learned that for the last two years he’s been working for Uber.
Here’s what The Huffington Post had to say in August 2014 about Plouffe teaming up with Uber.
“As presidential advisors and confidantes peel away, their destinations say a lot about their values. There were a lot of ways for David Plouffe to make boatloads of money in the private sector, but it’s hard to interpret the fact that he chose this particular battle to be anything but some form of incipient, free-market libertarianism.”
David Plouffe
Well that son of a bitch…I tell you what, I’m so mad I hope the Uber bubble pops like the dotcom crash of 2000-2002. And one more thing…I’m never going to let Patty arrange an Uber ride for the two of us again. I’m finished…Well, as you might be gathering, I never really got started because I don’t have a phone that allows me to fetch an Uber car. But still, I’m finished.
…I feel better now; I’m ready for the cutting, sawing and attachment of prosthetic devices to begin.
JimmyCsays: At the juncture of journalism and daily life in KC 
Jim, You’re getting cranky because you are OLD!!!! Get used to it!!
That’s worrisome, Marcie. I didn’t equate the two. Will you still play golf with me?
RE Cruz: The Donald is desperate for legitimacy, so much so he is willing to allow the next best thing to real GOPers –Carson, Christie & Cruz– speak on his behalf in the belief that those at home, transfixed by this train wreck of a “convention” on the TV, will have long forgotten i.) no REAL Republican deigned to appear at this travesty, and that ii.) Carson, Christie & Cruz were/are political incompetents who’s “endorsements” (when given; wink wink nudge nudge know what I mean, right?) are not worth the monetary air time they’re allowed.
Of course this attempt at legitimacy failed (IMHO), with the Republicans nominating a Benito Mussolini /Mr. Bean mutant for president.
How the GOP survives this in anyone’s guess.
I know this much: Trump and Pence are going to win Missouri, Kansas and Indiana. And probably most of the South.
Possibly: Kansas most certainly, as OG ReThug Kobach crafted the more heinous planks of the RNC’s platform – gotta support one of our own!; Missouri, likely. And maybe a preponderance of the lesser electoral college counting states. But expect Fla and Tex-Ass! to narrowly go for Clinton, or split between all 3 candidates…
Personally, I’m waiting for the ” fart-in” during Hil’s acceptance speech next week. Maybe that will assuage your crankiness.
Your name-calling of Ailes did make me chuckle … creepy fat perv.
Actually, the phrase threw me momentarily; I was lost trying to decide whether he meant Ailes, Christie or Newt. Surely all apply?
JimmyC: do they have you on psychotropic meds as a lead up to the bio-mechanical butchery? You had Ted Cruz hailing from the great state of Florida! Clear yourself, man.
Thanks, Rick…I will correct…About those meds, the strongest thing I’m on is Gabapentin. So no excuses there.
Jim:
Your surgery is going to be fine and you will feel and operate better than ever.
Stop worrying!
We are all with you.
Cheers,
Laura
Good luck on the surgery, but keep this in mind: the most important part of the process is entirely up to you. It’s the rehab. Yes, the rehab. Don’t slack and always try to do MORE than they tell you. You’ll heal faster and realize a better outcome for years to come.
Thanks to both of you..And, yes, I’m fully aware of the need to stick with the rehab. I’ve never had to do much rehab with arthroscopic surgeries, so this is going to be a severe test, which I must pass!
Gayle — I’m very relieved to hear that my reference to Ailes as a “fat f—” (don’t want to use the word any more than necessary) made you laugh instead of recoil. I look to you as a barometer of taste, and I guess I passed the bar on this one.
Yes, as distasteful as it is in most applications, it is particularly appropriate (and humorous) in this one. (Hey, anyone who thinks a fart-in is funny has to appreciate it.)
I’m not sure I want to explore the “fart-in” concept…
Good luck on the cutting, Jimmy C- YOU OLD GOAT!!
Thanks, Bob, but there’s no grazing going on around here…
Good luck Jim! We’ll be thinking of you.
Good luck on your surgery, but for a minute I thought they had already put you on the laughing gas since you were far more pleasant on this column than some other recent adventures.
Offer still holds to sneak any food into your room you want. Just call and I’ll make it happen.
Thanks, Jim and John…Almost “wheels-up” time…
Good luck with everything, Jim!
Thoughts and prayers. You’ll be fine.
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rage at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Uber isn’t that bad Jimmy. Welcome to the sharing economy. We could have dispatched Uber to pick you up after surgery or to deliver your KC Star paper!