For a long time now, I’ve had what I considered a pretty clever way of dealing with tailgaters.
What I was doing — on highways for the most part, because that’s where you encounter the largest number of people dealing with corn cobs up their asses — was grad-u-a-l-l-y slowing down.
I did that for two reasons: First, to send the tailgaters a not-so-subtle message that they were free to go into another lane and shoot around me whenever they wanted. Second, I admit with some shame, I just wanted to aggravate them.
I guess I’ve been lucky not to have been shot while engaging in such gamesmanship.
Here I am at 70 years of age, glad to be happy and healthy. I’d like to get to at least 75 in the same condition. So, as of today, gamesmanship on the highways is in my rear-view mirror. When someone comes up on me fast, I’m going to signal for a lane change and do it as soon and safely as possible.
You might ask: Why the change of heart now?
Well, I’ve just read two stories on local news outlets about people who got shot to death on area roads recently after becoming involved in road-rage incidents.
One was a woman. On Sunday night, 22-year-old Whitney M. Gray met her demise after an altercation near Winner Road and Sterling Avenue in Independence. The craziest part of that case is that Gray had three children in her minivan when things got out of hand. Fortunately, the three youngsters — a teenager, a 3-year-old and a child of less than a year — were not injured.
Fox 4 News is reporting that youngest children were Gray’s.

Whitney Gray and the two children who were in her car when she was shot and killed in a road-rage incident Sunday night in Independence.
The victim’s father, Sean Gray, told a Kansas City Star a reporter, “She was a great mother, and she was an awesome person.”
How awful — to be called by a reporter to sum up your dead daughter’s life after she was caught up in something as seemingly inconsequential as a roadway pissing match.
Independence police on Monday said they were searching for the driver of a white SUV they think was involved in the homicide.
Alsobrook will be going back to Texas (or already has) in a coffin or urn. And Crumpton is in the Platte County Jail, charged with second-degree murder.
Crumpton gave this account of the incident to authorities:
Both drivers were eastbound on Missouri 152. As they exited southbound onto I-29, Alsobrook’s SUV struck Crumpton’s car. Both drivers pulled over. Crumpton, carrying a loadedl handgun, got out of his vehicle and walked toward Alsobrook’s SUV.
Here’s where you’ve got to take Crumpton’s account with circumspection:
Crumpton said he heard Alsobrook yell, “I’m going to kill you.” Then, according to Crumpton’s account, Alsobrook began to drive toward him and Crumpton responded by shooting toward the SUV’s engine block and driver’s side-view mirror.
Crumpton then got back into his car, drove to a gas station and called 911…Police did not find a weapon in Alsobrook’s vehicle.
The Star quoted Platte County Prosecutor Eric Zahnd as saying: “If you’re the victim of a road rage incident, try to drive to a safe place. If you’re the instigator, this case is a tragic reminder of how quickly things can get out of control.”
Good advice. Here’s better advice: Don’t let yourself get sucked into a road-rage incident in the first place. It usually takes two to engage. Me? I’m getting out of the business of trying to send not-so-subtle messages to drivers in a big hurry. Way too many of those people are out there on the roads, and the best policy is to move over and let ’em blow by, especially now that we’re in the lock-‘n-load era.
Like I say, I want to make it to 75. I might even have grandchildren by then.
Insane happenings….I’ve forwarded your recap to my two kids…and my dear husband, as a good reminder that trying to impart your civic duty of letting all drivers know when they’ve done wrong is probably not going to end well at some point.
Very true, Lisa…We all need to resign ourselves to the fact that the highway is not a good teaching environment.
Hi Jim — The para below the pic needs a little clarification.
…It’s a very different world we live in these days, and very upsetting in many ways.
Thanks. “The victim’s father…”
They arrested and charged a 39-year-old man with the shooting. According to The Star, he was driving real close to her and someone from her car threw a drink at his SUV. No reason, whatsoever, to shoot someone.
Thanks for the update, Mike…Of course, it was pretty stupid to throw a drink at the SUV, but, like you say, pulling out a gun and firing shots in return was much, much more stupid. It just goes to show, once again, that with many people who are packing, the first thought when any indication of trouble arises is to reach for the weapon.
(From The Star’s account, it sounds like the 16-year-old passenger tossed the drink.)
http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/texting-driver-killed-a-79-year-old-man-her-sentence-4-days-in-jail/ar-AAj5KmZ?li=BBmkt5R&ocid=spartanntp
How many merely drove by this lady and others – weavers, slow-movers and red-light-runners – all synonymous with texting – with eyes fixed straightaway, thinking, “It’s not my problem” (despite the danger being directly to you)?
The alternatives aren’t “mind my own business” and “be a policeman on the road.”
Good to see both “Rounds” weigh in on this…
Rather than get angry and give people the finger and get upset I shrug my shoulders and give them a puzzled look. It’s amazing how many respond by trying to figure out some means to communicate with you why they did what they did.
Now for the flip side. I took my Suburban to the shop today because the thermostat was stuck. Within a couple of blocks of the house the engine was overheating. My response was to get there as fast as I could, breaking many traffic laws in the process. You never know why someone wants, or needs, to get somewhere in a hurry, so Fitz’ response is the best, turn on your turn signal and get the hell out of the way.
Good point, John, there are some genuine emergencies that prompt people to push the pedal down. Glad you made it to the mechanic shop without incident.
Fitz, here is a very sad followup to this story. I think that Fox 4 News has been doing some great work. Their reporter found two people who tried to save Ms. Gray after she was shot. Their web site is the best of the local news networks.
http://fox4kc.com/2016/10/18/two-men-who-tried-to-save-independence-mom-say-they-cant-get-her-off-their-mind/
Mike is demonstrably correct. As I’ve pointed out before, Fox 4 leads the race for Facebook likes and they are far and away the leader in having stories shared on Facebook. That is across all political ideologies. The public is not stupid, they know good reporting when they see it. And, what puts the nail in The Star’s digital coffin is that you don’t have to put up with 15 pop up ads trying to read he story on any of the TV news sites. Even KSHB at the bottom of the barrel had somewhere around twice the number of likes as The Star last time I checked.
Find the goofiest, incomprehensible, non-controversial, biggest, sticker/decal and affix it to your rear bumper. Aggressive drivers will assume you are a happy, non-threatening, cluesless, dunderhead and ignore you as they seek targets of greater reward.
Agreed with your thesis but not with your headline spelling of tailgating as a different kind of ‘gate’.
I must have been thinking about horses, John!
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