JimmyCsays: At the juncture of journalism and daily life in KC

I’m sure I speak for all of us when I say I’m shocked and appalled that Kansas City didn’t make Amazon’s Top 20 list for its secondary headquarters.

I’m almost at a loss for words, other than to say, as the unforgettable Seinfeld lawyer Jackie Chiles would have couched it: “It’s outrageous, egregious, preposterous.”

…What could these Amazon people have been thinking? They must have had scales on their eyes, blinding them to some of our greatest upsides, including:

:: A start-up streetcar system that runs two miles. (We might even get it extended a few miles, if we can wade through a miasma of legal complications.)

:: A new airport on the way. (If you squint, you can see it dimly in the far horizon. See it there, with the two-story fountain in the main concourse?)

:: One of the most successful arenas in the country. (“WWE Smackdown Live” coming Feb. 6. Don’t get shut out; tickets start at $18!)

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But enough of the sarcasm, eh? Nobody, not even Mayor Sly James in his wildest dreams, thought KC would make the Top 20. It was an exercise in pseudo chest thumping and inevitable disappointment.

Of, course, we had to do it. Every self-respecting city had to do it, had to try. If we hadn’t submitted an application, we’d be saying we’re a shitty, undeserving city and all our residents should pack up and look for someplace better.

And by no means is that what we are or what the vast majority of KC residents think we are.

We are a great city. We are vastly, monumentally improved over the last 15 years or so, since former Mayor Kay Barnes embarked on her crusade to reinvigorate Downtown and make it a worthy leg in the River Market/Downtown/Crown Center/Plaza corridor. (The corridor will be significantly strengthened, of course, if we can get the streetcar expansion up and running.)

Nevertheless, we don’t come close to matching up with the priorities Amazon was looking for, including:

— An advanced transit system

— Strong higher education institutions

— A highly trained technical force

— Financial incentives

On the latter point, A KC Star editorial today noted that Newark, NJ, which made the cut, offered an incentive package of $7 billion — many times bigger than Kansas City was able to offer.

On that point, the editorial said: “Matching New Jersey’s $7 billion would have been foolish. Amazon’s HQ2 is an important project, but not that important.”

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One point that jumped out from the list of cities that made the cut is that most are in the Eastern Time Zone.

So, this much is starting to become clear: With its headquarters in Seattle, Amazon is probably looking for a counterbalancing HQ in the East. That would make all the sense in the world from a business standpoint.

Here’s a list of the cities that were selected to go on to the next phase:

Atlanta, Austin, Boston, Chicago, Columbus, Dallas, Denver, Indianapolis, Los Angeles, Miami, Montgomery County Maryland, Nashville, Newark, New York City, Northern Virginia, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, Raleigh, Toronto and Washington D.C.

Before today, I thought Denver had a great chance to be get the nod for HQ2, but now I think the odds on Denver have risen quite a bit, despite all it has to offer. It’s in the Mountain Time Zone, just an hour ahead of Seattle.

Among the other cities, two in particular pique my interest…

Nashville

I’ve been there a few times and love it. One big advantage it appears to have over several of its competitors is a thriving public K-12 school system. According to Wikipedia, Metropolitan Nashville Public Schools has about 89,000 students. As of the 2013-2014 school year, the make-up was 37 percent Caucasian, 43 percent African-American, 15 percent Hispanic, 3 percent Asian and 2 percent other. (KCPS, by jaw-dropping comparison, has just 15,568 students, with a racial make-up of 57% black, 28% Hispanic, 9% white and 6% other.)

Another selling point for Nashville is Vanderbilt University, which The Star called “one of the most well-regarded private universities outside of the Ivy League.”

And yet, while Nashville is in the hunt, I doubt if it will win. Going back to that time-zone thing, it’s in the Central Time Zone, like us.

Columbus 

Even though I grew up not too far away in Louisville, Ky., I had never paid any attention to Columbus (which is in the Eastern Time Zone) or given it much thought until Patty and I went there for the denominational convention in 2015.

(Patty, for those of you who don’t know, has a business that designs and manufactures clergy garments, and she had a booth in the convention center’s exhibition hall.)

It was an eye-opening experience. Columbus’ assets include Ohio State University, one of the largest public universities in the country; unique and attractive neighborhoods with a variety of restaurants; and the seemingly ubiquitous Nationwide insurance.

With an estimated 2016 population of 860,090, it is the third most populous state capital in the United States, after Phoenix and Austin. Among midwestern cities (yes, it’s considered Midwest), it has the second highest population, after Chicago.

According to Wikipedia, Money Magazine ranked Columbus as one of “The 6 Best Big Cities” in 2016, calling it the best in the Midwest and citing a highly educated workforce and excellent wage growth. In 2013, Forbes gave Columbus an “A” rating as one of the top cities for business in the U.S. and later that year included the city on its list of Best Places for Business and Careers.

Iron arches announce the entry to Columbus’ Short North Arts District

Concentrated downtown, within walking distance, are the Nationwide Arena, the sprawling but navigable Greater Columbus Convention Center; and the alluring “Short North Arts District,” which is similar to (but, frankly, not as good as) our Crossroads Arts District.

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It will be fascinating to see how this competition plays out and which city lands HQ2. In a way, it’s a relief that Amazon won’t be establishing a second beachhead in Kansas City. Can you imagine the upheaval that would have generated throughout the metro area?

Among other things, think about traffic congestion and the soaring cost of homes, apartments and condos. For the privilege of having a huge headquarters building here, we would be guaranteeing ourselves a ton of inconveniences.

When I think about things like this — glittering baubles you’re tempted to reach out for — I often go back to Warren Beatty’s character John McCabe in the movie McCabe & Mrs. Miller. He’s in love with Julie Christie’s character, Constance Miller, whom he brings into a fledgling mining town to operate a whorehouse.

But things don’t go entirely smoothly, either on the business or romantic front (she’s addicted to opium), reducing Beatty to muttering one night, under the influence of alcohol, “Money and pain. Pain and money…Money…Pain.”

Can’t think of a better way to describe the prospect of Amazon plopping down here in KC.

Editor’s Note: On Friday morning, I changed the ending of this post.