One thing you can never be surprised by is the number of rednecks running around in society…and not just ours.
They’re worse than cicadas, and often times as loud.
Since they are so prevalent, I thought we should start highlighting some of them, some of the very best…or worst, I guess that should be.
At The Star, whenever we started a new feature, the problem was keeping it fresh and interesting, because once started, the feature had to run for usually a year, at a minimum, before we could let it drift away.
That’s not a problem in blogging, though: I have no idea how often this feature will run. Maybe periodically, maybe just this once. Anyway, away we go!
Case No. 1…Last week, some Lake Waukomis residents were subjected to “an awful image they’ll never forget,” as KMBC-TV reported on its website.
A Lake Waukomis resident took his cat down to the lake in a cage or carrier and proceeded to drown the cat by submerging the carrier for several minutes.
His cat…not somebody else’s cat. His cat. The KMBC story said that a mother and her children called 911 as, or after, “they watched in horror.” Other people apparently were watching, too.
According the a police report, Thomas Newhouse said he decided to drown the cat after returning home from church — church –and finding that the cat had bitten and scratched his fiance and his daughter-in-law.
Newhouse told police he didn’t see anyone around before he did the dirty deed, so he thought he was doing it in private.
Newhouse got a ticket for a city ordinance violation, animal abuse, and is scheduled to appear in court on Aug. 20.
Thomas Newhouse…Now there’s a redneck!
Case No. 2…On Sunday, The Star carried a front-page story by Eric Adler about cattle rustlers in Missouri. In rural areas, it’s a crime that never goes out of style.
The victim in this particular story was Bob Darrow of the Springfield area. Thirteen of his cows, with an estimated value of about $17,000, disappeared.
Apparently, it was not a very difficult case to solve. Police arrested 63-year-old Howard L. Perryman of Monett, MO.
Perryman
It seems as though Perryman is well known in Greene County. Here’s what Adler said about him:
“He’s previously been charged with nearly as many felonies, 60, as he is years old. He’s been branded with more than 20 felony convictions since 1967, including robbery, burglary and receiving stolen property. He has spent time in state and federal prisons.”
…I can’t help but interject something here: Do you think that a black resident of Greene County would still be walking the streets — and galloping around the hills — if he had been convicted of 20 felonies?
Anyway, let’s hear it for Howard Perryman: Now there’s a redneck!
Case No. 3…This is far, far away from the Kansas City area, but, as you know, we don’t have a monopoly on rednecks.
Last October, seven artworks valued at hundreds of millions of dollars were stolen from a museum in Rotterdam, the Netherlands. The New York Times said that the painters of the pieces included Picasso, Matisse, Monet and Gauguin. The thief (who later confessed) was 29-year-old Radu Dogaru of Romania, which is about 1,200 miles from Rotterdam.
But here’s the kicker…His 50-year-old mother, Olga Dogaru, told police that shortly after her son was arrested, she placed all seven works in a wood-burning stove and incinerated them, with the intention of destroying the evidence.
Forensic scientists at Romania’a National History Museum collected ash and other material found in Mrs. Dogaru’s oven. The Times story quoted the museum director as saying that material that classical French, Dutch, Spanish and other European artists typically used to prepare canvases for oil painting were discovered in the debris.
“In addition,” the story said, “copper nails and tacks made by blacksmiths before the Industrial Revolution and used to tack canvas down were found in the debris.”
Olga Dogaru
On Monday, the Dogarus appeared in court in Bucharest, and Mrs. Dogaru told a panel of three judges that she did not burn the artworks. When asked what had become of the paintings, Mrs. Dogaru gave no answer.
Of course, Mrs. Dogaru’s new circumstances might have influenced her revised story: She is now charged with destruction-of-property crimes that could land her in prison for three to 10 years. Even more indicative that she, indeed, burned the paintings is the evidence from the ashes.
So, where the paintings might be and whether they still exist are not known. But one thing we do know is that there’s at least one redneck in Romania. Olga…Now THERE’s a redneck.
JimmyCsays: At the juncture of journalism and daily life in KC 
So in the interest of journalistic fair play and political correctness, I guess we’ll be seeing a future post entitled, ” Now that’s an N-word”.
Maybe we can start with Clayton Dunlap who had sixteen drivers license suspensions, but was still driving, and killed Damian Slayton on 71 highway and Gregory when he flipped his car on top of the car Damian was riding in, also seriously injuring his mother. “Now, that’s an N-word!”
Or perhaps we should start with good old Orlando Shaw down in Tennessee, who admits to fathering 22 babies with fourteen mothers, all of which are supported on taxpayer-burdened public assistance while the grinining and unapologetic Orlando hunts down baby mamma number 15 and child number 23. “Now, that an N-word”.
So let’s compare and contrast the above heroes with a guy who drowned a cat and is made famous because he’s a redneck.
You write your blog, I’ll write mine. I just won’t read yours.
If Thomas Newhouse had killed, skinned & gutted and then fried up his cat to make a (smallish) pot of stew, I would have considered him a redneck.
Had Newhouse then dumped an unforgivable amount of catsup in the resulting dish, I would have considered him a tasteless redneck (and poor cook.)
I would, however, label no man for ridding himself an ill-behaved feline.
(Indeed I bore worse impulses toward my first wife. Doesn’t (necessarily) make me a redneck.
(Impulses – I should hasten to add should the NSA or worse be listening in – I merely nursed over the odd beer but certainly never acted upon.)
Will — As Lake Waukomis Police Investigator Pete Edlund said, there’s a right way and a wrong way to remove an unwanted family pet.
“There are all kinds of animal shelters that are more than willing to take discarded or unwanted animals. You don’t have to kill it and don’t have to drown it in the lake,” Edlund said.
It’s the manner of disposal, not the disposal itself, that throws Mr. Newhouse clearly into the Redneck camp.
As I said at the top, you can never underestimate the number of rednecks out there…And you should never argue with one. See this AP story posted today on The Star’s website…
STEELVILLE, Mo. — A float trip on a river in eastern Missouri turned deadly when a property owner became angry after seeing a man urinating on a gravel bar, authorities said Monday.
James Crocker, 59, of Steelville, is charged with second-degree murder. He is jailed on a $650,000 cash-only bond.
Crocker, a property owner along the river, is accused in court records of confronting a group of people on their float trip Saturday and shooting Paul Dart Jr., a traveling companion of the man who was urinating, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch reported. Dart, 48, of Robertsville, was shot in the head.
“It’s my property and I was going to protect it,” Crocker told police, according to court records.
Crocker went to a neighboring home and asked a woman to call 911 because he had just shot someone on the river, Crawford County Sheriff Randy Martin said.
So, Jimmy Crocker was just protecting his property. Yeah, from urine getting into the ground water, I guess.
The rustlers in Greene County sound really scary.
Unless you live in Atlanta.
“In Atlanta, African-Americans are 54 percent of the population, but are responsible for 100 percent of homicide, 95 percent of rape, 94 percent of robbery, 84 percent of aggravated assault, and 93 percent of burglary.
Source: http://www.atlantapd.org/uniformcrimereports.aspx
All over America, without fail, in every big city, the extreme violence that accompanies the type of crime seen above in Atlanta, is part and parcel of the demographic sea change in population not only in big cities, but throughout the nation.
Without a doubt, there are some humerous and stupid things going on with whats left of the Hee Haw hoi polloi. That said, I will take my chances with some dirtbag trying to steal my cow over the 250 to 300 thousand gang members now murdering, raping and killing in the President’s home town abattoir of Chicago.
“…I can’t help but interject something here: Do you think that a black resident of Greene County would still be walking the streets — and galloping around the hills — if he had been convicted of 20 felonies?”
Who the hell cares about over cooking the roast when the house is burning down?
Great word, Chuck — “abattoir” — I’d never heard it used or seen it in print. Perfect in the context you used it. (For those of you, like me, who didn’t know the meaning, it’s “slaughterhouse.”)
…I looked at the May 2013 homicide figures on your link, and it appears that they had five homicides in Atlanta in May (pretty darn low, it would seem), and there were four black victims and one white. As to perpetrators, the report said “five perpetrators unknown.”
Looks like they have a problem with clearing their homicides.
Looks like they also have a problem, like they do here, identifying the perps.
“Call the TIPS Hotline if you have any information.”
Really? No identification, no description, the news media must think everyone in town is using “The Force” to get through life.
Gotta admit, a Luke Skywalker’s Light Saber would come in handy on the Plaza if we can ever find out who is causing trouble down there.
Fitz,
Why bring the question of race with the cattle rustler in Greene County and his record? Just curious? Obviously the cattle rustler had eluded authorities until the most recent cattle theft.
Also I know cattle ranchers with Cessna Citation jets. And someone that watches Hee-Haw re-runs is not necessarily a red-neck. Part of my father’s income, even today, comes from Bluegrass, traditional Country music and he watches Hee-Haw. He’s not a red neck. He gives a lot of it to charities.
Buck Owens was a multi-millionaire when he passed away. And Roy Clark has a fortune too.
Jeff Foxworthy is the highest-paid comedian in history and Larry “The Cable Guy’ (Dan Whitley) is cleaning with cash too.
Foxworthy resigned from IBM, with his wife’s support to chase his comedy dreams. He chose to help his friends, Larry, Rom White, who is no red neck and a California beach boy, Bill Engvall, a former AA baseball player in the Angels chain.
He may wear Wranglers and boots, but so does George Strait.
Jim, a real redneck needs to wear white socks and drink blue-ribbon beer, or at least that’s how the old “line” goes – red necks, white socks and blue-ribbon beer (i.e., all-American guys). Now what I want to know is if there’s any correlation between having a red neck and being stiff-necked a la the Hebrews of the Old Testament. I wonder if anyone’s ever done a study on that distinct possibility. After all, inquiring minds want to know!
Rick — It seems as though I’ve wandered into a touchy area here…I’m afraid this is going to be the one and only installation of “Now there’s a redneck.” Ah, and I liked the idea so much…
Larry — Are you sure you read the part about the rustler correctly? All I said about race was, essentially, “Would a black man with 20 felony convictions be walking free in Greene County?” (one of the most conservative counties in the state, if not the country). I don’t think so.
And this was not a “You could be a redneck if….” story, nor was it a slam against anyone who wears boots and large hats. It was about three individuals (four, if you count the one I cited in the comments) who committed incredibly stupid, criminal acts and thus, in my opinion, qualified for special classification in the pejorative sense of the word.
As you know, George Strait is probably my favorite singer and performer. And let’s be clear about this…George, Buck, Roy and Jeff have made fortunes plying their country heritage, but they are anything but rednecks.
So long smarty.
Am I missing something? I don’t like the sound of that, Chuck…