• Home
  • About me: Jim Fitzpatrick
  • Contact

JimmyCsays: At the juncture of journalism and daily life in KC

Feeds:
Posts
Comments
« Let’s hug this pig close so it doesn’t slip away from us
A carbon copy of the 1999 Pamela Butler story, this time in Springfield »

The story of a brave and obviously amazing woman

February 14, 2014 by jimmycsays

One of the best stories you will ever find appeared in Thursday’s Kansas City Star on Page A-11.

It wasn’t written by a reporter; it didn’t even carry a headline.

It was an obit that appeared under the name Annabelle Buckner Allen.

Annabelle’s was the first obit among two and a quarter pages of obits. It jumped out, however, not because it was first but because it was clear, right up front, that this was a tragedy.

anna

Annabelle Buckner Allen

The smiling, blond woman looking out from the page was dead at 37. The photo alone, even a bit grainy, signaled this was a “must-read” obit.

Annabelle died last Monday after surviving five years with “non-smoking, terminal lung cancer.”

The story didn’t start out with that, however. Like many a personal story, it started with her birth…

“She was the youngest child, only by 15 months, which caused the relationships with her siblings to be quite ‘spirited.’ “

She graduated from K.U. in 1998, and then…

“After a couple of jobs in social work, she decided it would be a lucrative career and decided to get her master’s in social work from KU.”

At first, the reference to “lucrative career” kind of threw me. I thought it might be a joke, but the context didn’t give it away. But then the obit writer reported that a few years later…

“she decided to change career paths to yet another profitable job, teaching.”

From social worker to teacher…Indeed, we know this lady wasn’t trying to amass a fortune.

“After graduating with honors from Rockhurst University in record time (mainly because no math was involved), Annabelle began teaching second grade at Red Bridge elementary. This was her true calling.”

But then the writer dropped the bomb that you knew had to be coming…

“Unfortunately after only teaching for three months, she was diagnosed with…”

You would expect the story to go straight to pathos from there, but it didn’t…

“To the surprise of everyone, in the summer of 2009, Annabelle’s longtime friendship with an amazing man, Tom Allen, turned romantic and eventually led to marriage in 2011.”

Talk about an unexpected twist…From the timing, it appears that Tom knew about the cancer before he got serious about her. If that’s the case, he gets the Kansas Citian of the Decade award.

The story continued in a positive vein, marginalizing the cancer and emphasizing the good times…

“Despite the bad luck with her health, Annabelle was proud to say that she and Tom had one of the greatest love stories of all time. Although no children of their own, Annabelle and Tom loved their nieces and nephew immensely and cherished their time they shared together.”

The obit writer then revealed that Annabelle had a hand in its preparation…

“Annabelle will be known for her impeccable organizational skills, quick wit (she wrote that) and enormous charm (she wrote that too).”

Inevitably, the elements of tragedy returned: Her survivors include both grandfathers and her paternal grandmother.

I once heard a saying that goes like this: “When your parents die, you lose your past; when your children die, you lose your future.” Imagine what it must be like for those grandparents to see Annabelle die in what should have been her prime.

Rounding out the story — before the reporting of the service time and place — the obit said…

“She is survived by her dashing husband, Tom; perfect mother, Christy; adorable sister, Margaret…talented brother, Brad…and so close to her heart, her nieces and nephew.”

Now there’s a story, readers, that should leave you emotionally drained but with a heart full of admiration for Annabelle and the family members who supported her.

As a KC Star reader, I want to applaud the obit writer for drawing a beautiful portrait of a beautiful woman who looked death in the face every day for five years and pushed ahead with good humor and incredible grace.

**

P.S. On this page, you can see a video of Annabelle talking about herself and her diagnosis.

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook

Like this:

Like Loading...

Related

Posted in Uncategorized | 8 Comments

8 Responses

  1. on February 14, 2014 at 11:25 pm Mike Rice

    Fitz,
    You’re not going to believe this but my son Jeremy was in Annabelle Buckner’s 2nd grade class at Red Bridge Elementary. At the time, Jeremy was new to Red Bridge. He had been at St. Elizabeth’s the previous two years but he had some reading issues that needed to be addressed. The Center School District was better equipped to handle those issues.

    Jeremy and Ms. Buckner really hit it off. And Catherine and I greatly appreciated her patience and understanding. She played a big part in helping Jeremy adjust to his new surroundings. He is now in 7th grade at Center Middle School and has thrived in that school district.

    I remember when Ms. Buckner was diagnosed with lung cancer and it shook all of us to the core. I remember checking in with her several months after her diagnosis and her telling me that she was feeling better but that her father had just recently died of cancer.

    This is the first I have heard about Ms. Buckner’s death and so I am very very saddened. She was a great lady. Very courageous. My deepest sympathies to her husband and family.


    • on February 14, 2014 at 11:33 pm jimmycsays

      Great addition to this post, Mike…It shows how deeply she affected people and that, indeed, she had found her true calling.

      …Be sure to look at the video that I noted in the P.S. that I added after posting.


  2. on February 15, 2014 at 1:15 am Larry Luper

    Prayers and condolences.


  3. on February 15, 2014 at 8:48 am Laura Hockaday

    Jim:
    I read the obit in the paper and also thought what an amazing woman and how tragic for her, her husband and all who knew her. The video was heartbreaking, knowing the outcome.
    Thanks, Jim, for putting Annabelle Buckner Allen in the spotlight, which she certainly deserves.
    All best,
    Laura


  4. on February 15, 2014 at 8:50 am Laura Hockaday

    P.S.
    Wonderful comment from Mike Rice.
    Laura


    • on February 15, 2014 at 9:22 am jimmycsays

      Thanks, Laura. Best to you, too.


    • on February 15, 2014 at 1:03 pm Mike Rice

      Thanks Laura


  5. on February 15, 2014 at 9:46 pm chuck

    Thanks for sharing this Fitz.

    I liked her matter of fact, honest approach with regard to her illness. The video was very good. Her admission of fear was an unintentional revelation of her courage in my opinion.

    God bless her on her journey and god bless the folks she left behind.



Comments are closed.

  • Pages

    • About me: Jim Fitzpatrick
    • Contact
  • Archives

    • April 2023
    • February 2023
    • January 2023
    • December 2022
    • November 2022
    • October 2022
    • September 2022
    • August 2022
    • July 2022
    • June 2022
    • May 2022
    • April 2022
    • March 2022
    • February 2022
    • January 2022
    • December 2021
    • November 2021
    • October 2021
    • September 2021
    • August 2021
    • July 2021
    • June 2021
    • May 2021
    • April 2021
    • March 2021
    • February 2021
    • January 2021
    • December 2020
    • November 2020
    • October 2020
    • September 2020
    • August 2020
    • July 2020
    • June 2020
    • May 2020
    • April 2020
    • March 2020
    • February 2020
    • January 2020
    • December 2019
    • November 2019
    • October 2019
    • September 2019
    • August 2019
    • July 2019
    • June 2019
    • May 2019
    • April 2019
    • March 2019
    • February 2019
    • January 2019
    • December 2018
    • November 2018
    • October 2018
    • September 2018
    • August 2018
    • July 2018
    • June 2018
    • May 2018
    • April 2018
    • March 2018
    • February 2018
    • January 2018
    • December 2017
    • November 2017
    • October 2017
    • September 2017
    • August 2017
    • July 2017
    • June 2017
    • May 2017
    • April 2017
    • March 2017
    • February 2017
    • January 2017
    • December 2016
    • November 2016
    • October 2016
    • September 2016
    • August 2016
    • July 2016
    • June 2016
    • May 2016
    • April 2016
    • March 2016
    • February 2016
    • January 2016
    • December 2015
    • November 2015
    • October 2015
    • September 2015
    • August 2015
    • July 2015
    • June 2015
    • May 2015
    • April 2015
    • March 2015
    • February 2015
    • January 2015
    • December 2014
    • November 2014
    • October 2014
    • September 2014
    • August 2014
    • July 2014
    • June 2014
    • May 2014
    • April 2014
    • March 2014
    • February 2014
    • January 2014
    • December 2013
    • November 2013
    • October 2013
    • September 2013
    • August 2013
    • July 2013
    • June 2013
    • May 2013
    • April 2013
    • March 2013
    • February 2013
    • January 2013
    • December 2012
    • November 2012
    • May 2012
    • April 2012
    • March 2012
    • February 2012
    • January 2012
    • December 2011
    • November 2011
    • October 2011
    • September 2011
    • August 2011
    • July 2011
    • June 2011
    • May 2011
    • April 2011
    • March 2011
    • February 2011
    • January 2011
    • December 2010
    • November 2010
    • October 2010
    • September 2010
    • August 2010
    • July 2010
    • June 2010
    • May 2010
    • April 2010
    • March 2010
  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

    Join 567 other subscribers

Blog at WordPress.com.

WPThemes.


  • Follow Following
    • JimmyCsays: At the juncture of journalism and daily life in KC
    • Join 567 other followers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • JimmyCsays: At the juncture of journalism and daily life in KC
    • Customize
    • Follow Following
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Copy shortlink
    • Report this content
    • View post in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...
 

    %d bloggers like this: